Save Our Mince!

I sat down to do a parody of this, before it dawned that some things speak far more eloquently left to themselves :-)

For Whom The Bridge Tolls

Is it just me, or does it sound like the master of the Forth Road Bridge might have his priorities a wee bit skewed here?

TAXPAYERS are set to get a £2million bill for removing the toll booths on the Forth Road Bridge - just a year after £5million of public cash was spent upgrading them.

Bosses are preparing to get rid of the booths after the SNP Executive scrapped tolls on the bridge.

And they are gutted at having to knock down their state-of-the-art "toll booth plaza", the most sophisticated of its kind in Britain.

The Forth Road Bridge's bridge-master, Alastair Andrew, said yesterday: "From a professional point of view, we have been focusing on delivering the most up-to-date tolling system in the UK.

"Having focused the team's efforts on that for the past two years, there is terrific disappointment that we have now been told to remove it before it can be used to its full capacity.

"But we just have to accept the will of parliament."

Was It The Sunday Times Wot Won It?

It may have taken until the last declaration, but with the SNP topping the poll in the Lothians regional ballot, giving the party 3 additional MSPs to Labour's 1, it was the nationalists that finished the election ahead by a nose, with 47 MSPs to Labour's 46. Hardly resounding, but taken with our superior share of the vote and gains at the expenses of both governing parties, it's mandate enough to start putting together an administration.

The big question for me, though, is: 'how many more seats would the SNP have won had it escaped the final two weeks of monstering it received in The Sun and the Daily Record?'. Both rags carried 'features' this week, which urged electors in certain seats to vote tactically against the SNP. Although most would either have ignored the request or reacted with anger, I'm sure that it still had a certain effect on some readers, which may go some way to explaining why the SNP missed a few of its 'easier' target seats, but picked up so many unexpected ones along the way.

I'm told from the Edinburgh council count that our local candidate stormed the New Town, of all places, coming top amongst the first preference votes cast. Maybe the valedictory headline for this election, then, should be that 'It Was The Sunday Times Wot Won It'. Certainly, it can't be comfortable right now to be editor of the Scottish Sun, waiting for that call from Rupert Murdoch so you can explain exactly how you got your call so badly wrong.

And for what it's worth, I've nae sympathy for David Dinsmore at all. If his head is in any kind of noose right now, it'll be one he's tied for himself...