Alexander 'To Go On SNP Offensive'

With particular emphasis on the 'offensive', no doubt. Anyway, like most adult Scots males of my age and fighting weight, I'm going to give Wendy a miss to go and watch the fitba' instead.

Rangers v Celtic... it's a bit like Ken v Boris as far as I'm concerned. The contest will be full of thrills and spills no doubt, but for me it's still a case of may the worst one lose!